Life is a Beautiful Adventure

So, here we are. 6/25/2015. I am less than a year from graduating from college. I am very excited and very nervous. It's almost time to move up in the world, to have a job that I love. It feels strange that I'm so close to the point of culmination. I have been working at this for so long, it feels like I won't know what to do when it's gone. 

College graduate. A phrase I never could have imagined would be next to my name. And while I am not quite there yet, being who I am, I have already begun considering my choices for where I could end up. My minds unavoidable wondering has caught me daydreaming of places like New York City, or Chicago. Being of sound mind, and above average breast size (thanks Easy-A) I can't help but to question my sanity. I have never used public transportation. In the "small" (lol) city of Oklahoma City, public transportation is to be avoided like the plague unless you have no other choice. 

I grew up in a city of roughly 610 Thousand people, while Manhattan alone has 1.64 Million, not counting the other Burroughs. That's more than double. Chicago has 2.72 Million, that's more than QUADRUPLE. Needless to say, that's a lot more than I am used to. What's a girl from the Southern Midwest to do? 

I will tell you. She is to put her head high and submit some applications. If there is one thing my Southern Midwest (Okies really don't know how to label themselves geographically) lifestyle has taught me, it's that you always work your ass off for what you want. So what if the first trip I take to New York is the day I move there, or maybe even the time I go to be interviewed? I am bound and determined to see the world from more than the Tornado Alley. 

I have spent my entire young life Googling places like NYC, Chicago, London, and Tokyo. Because I haven't had the opportunity to go. I can't even imagine being able to wake up there. What if I move away and get the smell of the city on me? What if they hate the way I say y'all? What about the accent, will I lose it? Can I even get cornbread in NYC?! (Okay, but that's not a real concern I have.)

I have such an opportunity ahead of me, and I look forward to getting where I am going. Let me at 'em, & I will hit 'em with that Okie charm. 

Pitch Perfect 2 as a Social Movement

Yesterday I was one of many sitting in a crowded theater, floors sticky and chairs just uncomfortable enough to keep you awake. I was attending the 6:30 PM showing of Pitch Perfect 2 with my friends Valerie and Wendi.

So, there we are sitting about halfway back when the weirdest commercial I have ever seen comes on, It was for Chobani yogurt, and I couldn't be more surprised. Past the very odd commercial blending dirt, cows, and yogurt, we sat through previews of movies that we didn't particularly want to see, to finally get to the gold. The opening scene included Barack and Michelle Obama, as well as a mishap at the historic Kennedy Center. As well as including some very interesting social references. At a point in our nation's history where race relations have spiked to the forefront again, there is a lot of referencing towards minorities not only in race, but also in the fact that they are women. Take for instance the character Cynthia Rose, at a certain point in PP2 when a reference to a minority is made she looks at the person who makes the reference and says "I'm black, gay, and a woman." At this point, at least in my theater (I live in Oklahoma so it is a proud moment) people started to clap. It says a lot to me because this means we are becoming more aware as a whole that these issues exist.

There is also an Asian and a (I believe) Guatemalan woman represented in the cast. There is a man in the cast that is strongly disliked by most who have seen the films, John the announcer has throughout both plots been a severe sexist and in PP2 even makes the statement that "this is what happens when you allow women in college." It thrills me that in my theater this was met with groans and anger from the majority of the audience.

I know that in modern times it is easy to forget but very recently women weren't allowed to be educated at the collegiate level. It also means a lot to me that you could tell that people were uncomfortable with some of the racial slurs and anti-women comments that were made. Uncomfortable is the first step towards action. As a modern feminist, I have to wonder how it took so long for a movie to come to the forefront that demonstrates such strong female ideals, but it really isn't. Clueless, Legally Blonde, Miss Congeniality, and Easy A. There is also a long list of movies that have much deeper sub-messages than most people realize: see The Breakfast Club, Mean Girls, Hairspray, and 13 Going on 30. Demonstrate high ideals, and eventually we will all be equal. Work for it, we will earn it. Together.

Intern Search 2015

So, here we all are. April 2015 and I am looking for an internship. I have applied at a handful of places both in Oklahoma City (my native land) and Texas (the closest large market). Pending all of these applications, I can't help but wonder if I will end up somewhere that I want to. Every place I have applied at has its own strength, and much like the employees, those individual strengths make up the genetics for a fantastic work environment. 

Whether it is a full service agency or not, all of these companies bring something to the table that I admire. While this is certainly true, I can only hope that they will see that I could contribute something to their table. 

Things about me that you won't find on my resume:

• My incredible sense of humor. 

• My set of moral obligations. 

• My sense of leadership and ownership. 

• My sense of self. 

• My contributions to group work. 

• My generally happy demeanor. 

• My community side.

Here's hoping that I seal the deal with one of the companies I have applied to, I know I would be thrilled to work with any one of them. 

People in Glass Houses Sink Ships

I have been having a bit of a rough patch in my life lately, dealing with the day to day of school and work and general things. As each day passes I seem to tense myself up more and more over trivial matters. So, today I wrote down a list of everything I am stressing out about. Then in another column, I wrote what I can do about these stresses. It seemed surprisingly simple that the solution of "I need more money" was to get another job. And while getting another job isn't exactly going to be easy, it gave me a sense of peace to be able to have something to kind of just say "chill out". 

I have always been pretty high strung, as a product of my mom who dealt with a lot in her short life as a single parent, I believe I learned some of my anxious habits from her. I also believe I picked up some of her less attractive personality traits. She was an incredible woman, but she had insecurities like we all do. I learned to worry about money from her. I learned how to worry about bills, and debt collectors too. I also learned how to love someone unconditionally, no matter how they break your heart. I learned how to make the best comfort foods, and little tips and tricks about making people laugh, and tweaking your personality. I blame her for my insufferable sense of humor. So where does the vicious cycle of traits end? I have seen it before, my cousin is critical of herself because her mom is critical of herself. I am emotionally almost codependent on people whose opinions I value. I shouldn't need permission to live my own life or make my own choices. 

It's a harsh world when you really think about it, and because I lost my mom so early in the stage where you need to learn coping the most, I'm not sure I ever really learned how to properly. It's a work I progress, and a change that cannot happen overnight, but I am hopeful for a bright future for myself. I bring a lot to the table and I will no longer allow myself to sit on the edge of the room when there is a meeting at the table. Being present is everything. Being a gift is something different. 

A Dime

"Next time you get dumped, hand this to him and tell him to go buy himself a cheap piece of ass and to keep the change." -Bettie 

An older woman, with a sense of self the likes of which I had never seen, asked me Monday morning at my day job what was wrong because I looked pretty down. After explaining that it was because I had been dumped the day before, she said "oh whatever honey, you don't need him anyway." With her loud voice and her unmistakeable attitude, I actually started to feel a little bit better. 

Bettie is a member here at my day job. She had no obligation to try to make me feel better. Most people don't even respond to our "good morning" greetings. But the fact that she did speaks volumes to me. She spread a little love where she didn't have to. Sure, I celebrated the break up with Starbucks and a glass of wine, but I really felt the love here. Bettie genuinely cared that I had something to hold onto with this. Good people are still around. Good people are still being good people. 

Are you a good person? Are you doing everything you can to be a good person to your fellow being? Think about it. 

Do Good & Do Well. 

Sundance Film Festival and Me

Today, a movie that I helped make (with an extremely talented professor of mine) was released to the public for viewing. This is a huge moment for me and everyone involved. 

It is so incredible to know that my name was on something that premiered at Sundance Film Festival, even if I couldn't be there. I am so blessed to live this life. I am so thrilled that this has fallen in my lap, and I am running out of words to be honest. I need to thank some people:

To Morgan, thanks for telling me to join FVC, we wouldn't be here without you. To my dad, thanks for having no faith in me, I needed that to draw from. To my friends, thank you for always staying around. It's so incredible how many great people I am surrounded by. I am so blessed. 

Do you want to watch it?? 

http://indiancountrytodaymedianetwork.com/2015/02/03/watch-isabelles-garden-exclusive-premiere-sundance-honored-short-film-158988

Hey, there, it's been a while

So, when I checked how long it had been since I blogged about what is happening in my busy life, I realized just how much I missed telling no one about my life. So here it goes:

I have made the conscious decision to cut almost all ties with my father and do what ever I have to do to succeed without him. I'm dating someone who is pretty great, I'm about to start a new workout plan, and I'm actually having a really good time in school and such. It's a good life, at least that's what I'm told.